living on pb & j

Ordinary moms living on Prayer, the Bible, and Jesus!

I Hate Drama!


We break a nail. We get behind slow traffic. We don’t have anything new to wear to that special night. We are ready for church and the baby decides to leak through his outfit – all over us! We have to fill the car up with gas because our hubby forgot. The broiler was on, the phone rang, Junior smashed his finger, I forgot the broiler was on and just ruined my batch of toast – you know the batch where I just used all the rest of the bread. The kids have toys all over the floor and I can’t roll through! My cell phone is missing. It’s Sunday morning and time to go and somehow the toddler has already taken off his shoes and you can only find one. Facebook is having technical difficulties and I can’t get on. The crayon got left in the pocket that is now in my dryer. My tire goes flat on my wheelchair. The toilet overflowed. Four people are asking you questions at the same time with “emergencies” and then the phone starts ringing. Do I need to go on? Does this sound like your house? It sure sounds like mine!

It doesn’t take much to get us all out of whack and in a dither. Anyone of those things can get to me in moment depending on my mood. Especially when more than one of those things happen in one day! We talk about drama, we laugh about drama and we live in a lot of drama! But, I hate drama!! I hate it in myself!

I get really tickled when I speak at ladies meetings and women will come up to me and tell me that they wish they could have my sweet spirit, positive outlook, and sunny smile. I always laugh and tell them, “If you believe that, then PLEASE don’t talk to my husband and children!!” Just because I have decided to try to have a positive outlook regarding my disability, does not mean I handle the missing shoe episode very well! Actually, I don’t handle it well at all! I appreciate what they are saying to me, but I don’t want them to miss the point that life is very real around here and we all share in the same struggles. I don’t like myself in  my dramatic moments because when I think back on it, I get really embarrassed at how I acted! I was in a church service recently and witnessed the scene when a child accidentally dropped the offering plate. I thought the mother was going to have a stroke and I felt so sorry for that child! I also got mad at myself because I would like to think I wouldn’t have acted that way, but I have come unglued for lesser things.

One thing that life these past 3 years has taught me though, is that there are annoyances and then there is real trouble. This is not about broken nails, crying children and flat tires. Times of real despair. Times of heartbreak that weigh on you so heavy that you do not know how you will ever live through it. Times that you are so thankful that you have a Heavenly Father you can go to because there is not another living soul you can turn to.

Most of us don’t face these kind of things every week, month or even year for that matter. Aren’t you glad?!! But when we do face them, it is a grim reminder that the things that we allowed to get to us so dramatically, really weren’t that bad at all. I mean, when that child is laying in a hospital bed fighting to breathe, does it really matter that he lost his shoes? I think it would matter very little and I think the emotions I would be feeling would be shame and guilt that I was ever upset at something to trivial.

The point of this post is to remind me that there are things in life so much bigger than my drama. I want to live a life of no regrets – in everything I do. Remembering to stress less and keep the dramatics to the real issues of life are one sure way of making sure that I accomplish that goal. I think my hubby and kids will like me better too! Here’s to many less dramatic days ahead!




Author: Alicia Reagan

In March of 2009, while expecting my 6th baby, I contracted Transverse Myelitis - a rare illness that left me paralyzed from my ribs down. It has changed my life in many horrible and wonderful ways. I love to talk about it all. The good, the bad and the ugly. It is always raw and real around here as I share my work in advocacy and accessibility, my heart for the spiritual lessons learned, my music that speaks my soul, and my love for my home and family. Welcome.

2 thoughts on “I Hate Drama!

  1. Dear Alicia,

    Thank you so much, rather Praise the Lord for your transparency. Too often we look at other’s lives and forget they are normal (no offense) too. When we forget, we become delusional, and delusion almost always leads to defeat. I am certain you don’t want anyone to be defeated by your willingness to share truthfully. May our Lord bless you.

    I also want to comment on your post. I have been struggling lately with the dynamics of our home (three 5 year olds and a 4 year old, coupled with a 17 1/2 year old, and the burden of a wayward 21 year old). Struggling probably is not the right word. I think wrestling with God would be more appropriate, and in the midst of my battles the Lord in His faithfulness has given me His Word.

    “Yea, when they had made them a molten calf, and said, This is thy God that brought thee up out of Egypt, and had wrought great provocations; Yet thou in thy manifold mercies forsookest them not in the wilderness: the pillar of the cloud departed not from them by day, to lead them in the way; neither the pillar of fire by night, to shew them light, and the way wherein they should go.” (Nehemiah 9:18-19)

    Verse 18 really arrested me. To think that God’s people would make their own god and then ascribe HIS glory to it is to me the utmost of sin. (But I do the same thing.) Regret, Regret, Regret! And God has spoken to my heart of late that I should look at Verse 18 as the embodiment of all my children’s sins and observe and replicate His response to His children’s sins in Verse 19, Yet thou in thy manifold mercies forsookest them NOT in the wilderness (emphasis mine), because He did not forsake His children in their utmost nor does He forsake me. Too often my “reactions” to the daily life stresses, to my children, is ungodly, and I know that is wrong. I do not want the dramas of life to control me any more.

    This statement in Scripture, Yet thou in thy manifold mercies forsookest them NOT in the wilderness, has kept me all week in this regard, and the fruits of the Spirit have been trickling through. When I finished reading your post I immediately thought of God’s provoking to me and these Scriptures and thought maybe these words and the application will be a blessing to you as well. I have them printed and sitting on my desk in front of me as school time is especially trying and draining, let alone the broken nail, burnt toast, missing shoes, etc., etc., etc.!!

    I needed the reminder you wrote of here. The insignificant(s) will amount to nothing when we are watching a child struggle for their each breath, or whatever! I appreciate you!

    God bless,
    Loretta Smith
    Hebrews 10:24

    We church WORSHIP with Heidi S.S. My daughter, Heather, not too long ago requested permission to record one of your songs. I love how God intertwines each of His children into the tapestry of the family of God! :o)

    • Loretta,
      I am so glad that the Lord is helping and strengthening you. I love to write as it clears my own mind from the a lot of muddle!:) However, there is nothing sweeter and more helpful than when the Word of God feeds our souls. There we find lasting encouragement and lingering peace. It is just if we can remember to turn to it! The Scriptures the Lord helped you find are wonderful and I am so glad that they strengthened your heart. Don’t try to “hang on” dear sister for He is hanging on to you. Just cling to Him and His Word and you will be alright….we all will!!:) God bless you and I will pray for you!

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