living on pb & j

Ordinary moms living on Prayer, the Bible, and Jesus!

What Godly Women Can Do to Encourage the Pastor’s Wife


Since my husband and I started deputation I have had the opportunity to meet many pastor’s wives. My desire is to be a friend to each pastor’s wife I meet. To be honest, the Lord has impressed upon my heart to use our pre-field ministry as a time to minister to each one. I’m using this time to learn from the ladies God places in my life and also encourage each one. No two are the same, but they all have one thing in common – they are married to a pastor. Often the position of the pastor’s wife can be lonely. When I encourage the pastor’s wife, I’m encouraging the pastor, which in turn will help the entire church. Keeping the pastor’s wife encouraged is very important! Before I started deputation I purposed in my heart to ask each pastor’s wife for advice. Last week I met a pastor’s wife whose husband had pastored the same church for 57 years! Her advice was this, “A pastor’s wife is just that – his wife. The apostrophe and “s” means you belong to him.” I love that! I never heard anyone say it like that before and it made an impression on my heart. 2013-06-02 20.18.10

I was given this practical list of ways to encourage our pastor’s wives when I was in college. I hope this will help and encourage us to do our part to bless these sweet ladies God has put into our lives.

  1. Write notes of encouragement.
  2. Love and encourage her children.
  3. Pray daily for her.
  4. Tell her what a blessing she is to you.
  5. Speak kindly when you see her.
  6. Teach your children to love her.
  7. Serve in your church with enthusiasm when she calls on you.
  8. Be faithful to services and special meetings.
  9. Bring others to church with you and introduce them to her.
  10. Have a forgiving spirit – you disrupt the work of God when you don’t. Matthew 6:14-15
  11. Realize that she is not a perfect woman. John 8:7
  12. Never criticize her, her husband, or family. Proverbs 6:19 “He that soweth discord…”
  13. Choose the right time to talk to her about problems – not before a service.
  14. Remember special occasions in her life – birthday, anniversary.
  15. Tell her you love her regularly.
  16. Never go to her in anger. Proverbs 15:1 “A soft answer turneth away wrath…”
  17. Be her friend.
  18. Guard your personal devotional life.
  19. Never assume that she knows everything about certain situations (those who are sick, new baby, etc.)
  20. Try not to tell her things that will discourage her.
  21. Be considerate of her time. * Remember there is only one of her
  22. Don’t call her on the phone and expect her to spend hours talking to you about unimportant things.
  23. When  she is going through trying times personally – be helpful.

3 thoughts on “What Godly Women Can Do to Encourage the Pastor’s Wife

  1. Thank you for this post today… As a pastor’s wife this was such an encouragement today!

  2. How sweet you are to think of this great list of things. I will be sharing this with many ministry friends. Thank you! I am not a pastor’s wife but I think this also applies to other ladies on staff as much as it does the pastor’s wife.

  3. Pingback: A Call From God | Sure - anchor

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s