living on pb & j

Ordinary moms living on Prayer, the Bible, and Jesus!

Whole and Entire…

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I just love mid week services.

I know they can be hard to get to in the midst of a busy week of making meals, taking care of children and Husbands, attending sporting events, having work obligations and of course keeping up with our households. It’s definitely not always easy getting everyone out the door to Church on a Wednesday night.

But somehow we manage to make it in and I’m always so very blessed by the message!

This past week I found myself (once again) sitting there in awe as if the Lord was speaking directly to me!

I was having a difficult week. We’ve been battling sickness passing from one person to another in our home, I was missing my daughter terribly as I’m preparing for my newest little girl on the way, and I was just feeling…well… defeated.

I’m sure many of you can relate to weeks like this on occasion and they are just so discouraging.. It seemed like Satan was just throwing one thing after another at our family and I was feeling overwhelmed.

So once I got all my children into their correct places and as I took my seat, I felt a little relieved that I had a moment to breathe and let the Lord work on me…and believe me, I always need continuous work. He’s definitely still working on me.. =)

When my Husband read the scripture for our Pastor before the service, I immediately thought, yep this ones going to be for me.

We read in the book of James.

This is my favorite book in the Bible because I find it the most challenging. I always seem to find my way here on the weeks when I need reminded that my trials have a purpose and that God has a plan.

And though this week some doors that we thought the Lord was opening for things we had been praying for in our lives, they seemed to be closing right back behind us. So I thought.. I definitely need to hear this.

When my Pastor had us read again the first four verses of chapter one, I sunk into my seat waiting and willing what the Lord had to say to me.

James 1:1-4

1. James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ, to the twelve tribes which are scattered abroad, greeting.

2. My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations;

3. Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience

4 But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.

I had chills come over my body as I sat in my seat listening… I looked down at my Bible and noticed the word written to the left of this scripture and I couldn’t help but smile.

❤ Emmaline ❤

I was losing focus..

On my prayers. On my future. On my week.

Yes I know trials will come and temptations will test me. And yes I know I need to count it “all joy” when they do.. but that is not always easy.

I know that not every week will be a walk in the park and to be honest, it seemed like it had been a while since we walked a valley, so I sort of realized it was due.

Life isn’t always easy.

There are many ups and downs.

There are times of excitement…

Times of sorrow…

Times of frustration…

And times of complete joy.

But all of these times and these “moments” we experience, they mold us and make us into who we are and who we are meant to be.

But the thing that completely brought me back were the words found in verse four.

… That ye make be perfect and entire, wanting nothing.

They echoed over in my ears as I heard my Pastor say them, as I read and re-read them in my Bible and as I saw the name written just to the left.. Emmaline.

Emmaline scripture

Our sweet baby girl who we prayed so hard for.. The one who we asked God to send to help continue to heal our hearts and give us the opportunity to raise a daughter.

She truly is an answered prayer.

we prayed

And her name just happens to mean…whole and entire.

I leaned over to Rick with tears in my eyes and showed him the beautiful name that I had previously written in my Bible and reminded him, that’s what her name means.. of course he knew.

For that was why we picked it.

Yes, this week was full of trials, sadness and frustration for me but the Lord showed me in that moment that I was losing sight.

Yes some things we had been praying about didn’t seem to be working out at the time, but so much of what we have prayed for is..

And at the end of the day… God wants us to just rest in Him.

He wants us to be whole and entire, wanting nothing.

For if we put our trust in the Lord we can know and believe He has a plan for our lives. We just need to wait on Him. We need to try our best not to “want” so much but just know that in His time.. All things will work out.

I believe that. I truly do.

I’m not sure why this is so heavy on my heart today, and honestly I do pray it helps someone, somewhere to truly believe that God has such a plan in your life.

And if we can just put our wants and our desires aside long enough to seek His face, and fall fully into the will He has for us; I believe that down the line, we will have that ah- ha moment and completely understand the Lords heart.

It doesn’t always make our trials easy, but it definitely makes them worth it.

After the message I found myself  back on track and in a place of “entirety” so to speak.

He is all we need, He truly is. But He also has blessings for us in His time.

I miss my sweet Madeline Grace, I miss her every single day. But the Lord knows my heart and here in just 2 months, I will meet her baby sister. I know Emmaline Mercy will not be able to “heal” us.. Only God can do that, but I truly believe God is sending her to us to help us. She’s bringing us to a place of happiness and entireness.. especially in the Lord.

Whatever it is you are struggling with today friend, run to the Lord. Only He can provide the strength and grace to move forward, even during our hardest of trials and temptations. He knows right where we are and He wants to meet us there, and truly make us feel “whole and entire.” again. =)

May the Lord Bless you today!

Much Love,

Natalie ❤


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